Tag Archive | The Clock upon the wall

The clock upon the wall…

I see the clock upon the wall…but, right now, it still bothers me…

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Time…

Seconds, minutes, hours, days, weeks, months, years…

It all goes by so quickly. There never seems to be enough Time. And yet, Time is the one thing that all other things depend upon.

The Clock…it’s just an instrument–an instrument used to measure Time, a transcendental concept capable of having a beginning and an ending while still existing. Quite philosophical.

How is it that something so abstract…something completely intangible…something that cannot be tasted, seen, smelled or heard…how is it so intertwined in all we do?

Time is a crucial part of our lives. It is by far the most precious and sought after resource. We spend Time; we waste Time; we kill Time; we lose it; we gain it. We run out of Time; we share Time; we have some to spare. We watch Time…we reflect on it…we fantasize about it. We need it to dream and plan and grow and live and love and dance! We need it to be still. We need it to slow down. We need it to speed up. We need it to wait for us. We need it in order to catch up.

I have been struggling with Time for quite a while. My eyes are always fixed on The clock upon the wall...  I am always measuring how much Time I have, how much I’ve spent, how much I need, or how I need it to creep so that I can soak up the moments, learn the lessons and appreciate the memories…

Being a wife, a mother of 8, a business owner and a writer requires enormous amounts of Time, especially when it is my desire to do these things well. They all require full commitment, being completely present, being in the moment–again, descriptions that reflect the significance of Time.

Some days, my Time–what precious little I have–is used wisely and efficiently. However, there are those days–and there are many–where Time is an angry, bucking bull and I’m holding on for dear life, being tossed and thrown about, not knowing whether I’m coming or going, wishing to just make it out alive.

That’s where I’ve been the last 3 weeks…at the “Time is beating the hell out of me” Rodeo!

So many things have happened…things profound, momentous and thought-provoking. So many circumstances and situations that deeply inspired me to write and share, but I didn’t have the Time.

~My baby brother got married. I didn’t write because I didn’t have the Time.

~My son Brandon graduated from high school…I didn’t have the Time.

~My son Noah graduated from elementary school…again no Time.

~I went home to Louisiana for the first time since my Parrain died…and I still had no Time.

The past 3 weeks has been a whirlwind of emotions, preparations, appointments, activities, obligations, travel, commitments, etc. One day seems to spill into the next, and the next, and the next.

And you know, I’m not really certain what the purpose of this blog post is. I have not arrived at any sort of solution for this. I’ve had no epiphany…no revelation. In fact, it has taken me so much Time to even write this.

Maybe the point here is that there is no solution…

Or maybe, just maybe, the solution lies within the problem…

Perhaps, The clock upon the wall…serves as a reminder to observe the here and now rather than focus on what is yet to be.

Maybe the only way to tackle the beast of Time is to dance with it, toe-to-toe, in-sync with the rhythm, no longer trying to race it, realizing it is impossible for us to win.

As I sit here writing this, listening to the synchronized ticking of the clock on my fireplace mantle and the one on the kitchen wall, I’m reminded of an old song entitled Everchanging Times by Siedah Garrett…the theme from the movie Baby Boom.

I’m reflecting on the lyrics…(Click here to listen)

And these, are everchanging times
Everything is going so much faster
It seems like I’m
Watching my life, and everything I do
Wondering if the dreams that I believed in
Still come true

Caught in between, it comes back to
You and me are running out of time, I gotta find me a better understanding
Every day keeps forgetting what’s mine, I gotta find me a way, less-demanding
And we’re holding on so tight, together, all of our lives

And I, I had some big idea
So much of my life, still not completed
Hopes and Fears
Watching it change, into something new
Wondering it I’m gonna find the answer, loving you

All of my life, it comes back to
You and me are running out of time, I gotta find me a better understanding
Every day keeps forgetting what’s mine, I gotta find me a way, less-demanding
And we’re holding on so tight, together, all of our lives

But, it don’t bother me at all
It’s an everchanging time
I see, that clock upon the wall, it don’t bother me at all
It’s an everchanging time

All of my life, it comes back to
You and me are running out of time, I gotta find me a better understanding
Every day keeps forgetting what’s mine, I gotta find me a way, less-demanding
And we’re holding on so tight, together
And we’re gonna be alright, together, all of our lives

I see that clock upon the wall, it don’t bother me at all
It’s an everchanging time

Maybe the answer lies within the lyrics of this song. Perhaps I need to find a “better understanding” and a “way, less demanding.” Maybe then, when I see The clock upon the wall…maybe it won’t bother me at all…eventually.

 ~~~

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